Impulsive Envy
by Skye
Summary: Minako knew the best thing was for her to keep her feelings to herself. Minako/Usagi


**Impulsive Envy**

Minako had noticed, though she likely wasn't the first, that Usagi was nearly pure id. She was so blunt and upfront with her intentions, giving only transparent coverings to her wishes and desires. Though others had noted a similarity between her and Usagi, this trait was something that was fundamentally different. Usagi was free to put her passion on display, loving and being loved by who she wanted, while Minako hadn't yet had the pleasure of knowing what her beloved's reactions would be if they even knew her feelings.

That was a vice of her gathered maturity, Minako was sure, and a habit that would be wise to keep. Still, she wished she could be even more like Usagi, and pursue her love no matter what. She'd almost feel a little jealous of the other girl, if it wasn't Usagi of course. Usagi might be rash and impulsive, but there was no denying that she was also a wonderful person. She had her own desires, but deeply cared for her friends, at times even taking on their problems as if they were her own.

Which was a main reason Minako couldn't let Usagi know her feelings. If Usagi knew that Minako's current crush was out of reach, she'd go on about how Minako shouldn't give up, and should keep going for her love. If Usagi knew Minako's crush was her... Well, she'd feel guilty, most likely. It would start a rift between them, and even if Minako knew they could never be together the way she desired, she couldn't stand to be apart from the friendship she had with the bubbly senshi now.

"Minako-chan, what's wrong?" Usagi asked.

"Nothing, why do you ask?" Minako said cheerfully, smiling, unable to be too down as she had Usagi to herself that day.

"Oh, I don't know, it's just Minako-chan hasn't been talking too much today. Ah, I know, you're disappointed Mako-chan couldn't make it?"

"It's no trouble to me, I'll see her when she's free. I just have a little something on my mind," Minako let slip.

"Little something?" Usagi repeated, a smirk crossing her face.

Minako immediately regretted the confession, seeing Usagi's mischievous mind waking up to the possibilities. "A little... Nothing. It's nothing, really," Minako insisted. But it was too late.

"Maybe, Minako-chan has a lover now?" Usagi suggested happily.

"No, it's nothing like that," Minako insisted.

"Just a crush then?" Usagi guessed, looking into Minako's eyes.

"Uh..." Minako said. Usagi was getting a little too close to her, and a little too close to the truth. "Actually-"

"I knew it! Who is it? Do I know this guy?" Usagi asked.

"Well, it's not a guy, really-"

"A girl then? I didn't know Minako-chan was like that at all!" Usagi exclaimed. "Uh, of course, I'm fine with it," she quickly added. "But who is it?"

It was just as predicted. Usagi was curious, as curious as Minako would be in the same situation. But, she hadn't actually admitted to anything. And it was best that it stay that way.

"It's nothing! Don't ask me anything else!" Minako snapped. Usagi's cheerfulness disappeared in an instant. It wasn't so much as Minako asking for privacy, it was just that that Minako had certainly been directing some sort of frustration towards the other girl. Minako notice Usagi's clear feelings right away, just by the the shocked look on her face. "Usagi, I-"

Usagi took Minako's words internally, and felt terrible. Minako didn't usually act like this, and seeing as she did now, it must have been something terrible that Usagi herself had done to make her act this way. "Minako, I'm sorry!" she shouted.

"Usagi, it's fine. I just don't want you to worry about me, I-"

"I shouldn't have bothered Minako-chan so much. I never think," Usagi said, tears beginning to fill her eyes.

Minako smiled, taking Usagi's hand. "Don't worry about it. You could never bother me too much, Usagi-chan," she said.

"Really?" Usagi asked, fighting back tears. She hated to seem like a crybaby when she had mature Minako's full attention.

"Yeah," Minako nodded.

"Then, why are you angry?" Usagi asked, slightly calmer. Minako dropped her hand suddenly. "Mi-Minako-chan?" Usagi stuttered, starting to become upset again.

"I guess I can't hide it from you. I am in love with a girl. I just didn't want you to know, I don't want you to think any less of me."

"But I told you, I'm fine with that! Minako-chan can love whoever she wants!" Minako smiled at Usagi's words, wishing they were indeed true for her. Usagi continued to speak. "Why would you get angry about that? I'd be happy for you no matter what!

"Not if you knew who it was," Minako said, a long lost melancholy again lacing her voice.

"No," Usagi insisted, grabbing Minako's hand and looking directly in her eyes. "Anything you could tell me, it doesn't matter. Nothing could ever damage our friendship, Minako-chan."

"It would though, Usagi-chan. If you knew my feelings..." Minako stopped herself before going too far, looking away from Usagi.

"Minako-chan..." Usagi began gently. "This person you love... It's me, isn't it?"

Minako looked back at Usagi, shocked. She knew that Usagi, despite her self-absorption, could be insightful in her own way, but she never expected her to figure it out. And now that she knew, what would happen to them?

"Minako-chan," Usagi said, hugging her friend. "It's okay. I meant what I said."

"It's not okay, Usagi!" Minako said, unable to let go of her optimistic friend. "I could mess things up for the team, thinking this way. I could mess things up for you, and for us as friends. It's selfish."

"Well, I know all about that," Usagi said guiltily. Minako, despite herself, let out a sudden laugh. Soon Usagi was giggling along with her.

Minako wasn't sure how things turned right then. She was enjoying, despite her upset state, being so close to the object of her affection. Usagi, though she did talk about how beautiful Minako was at times, couldn't feel the same way, or could she? Despite that, Minako was sure she wasn't the one to initiate it as she found herself involved in a passionate kiss with Usagi. It surprised her at the same time as engulfing her, and she kissed Usagi back.

Usagi, that impulsive girl, what was she thinking? Minako knew the answer. This was genuine, not pity. Usagi was just acting on her desires, the same as she always did. Still, this couldn't work. There was senshi business to deal with, not to mention Usagi had a boyfriend. And they were kissing in such a public place. This kind of interaction between the two of them could only disrupt people, both now and later.

It was all true, but Minako decided to push it aside. Couldn't she be like Usagi, and pursue what she wanted, just for a little while? Or maybe, forever?


End file.
